I've been suicidal since I was about 10 years old. I'm 23 now. That's 13 years of wanting to kill myself and 13 years of battling with depression. It's exhausting. I was diagnosed with a mental illness two years ago and it explains the depression and suicidal thoughts/attempts as both of those are a symptom of said mental illness. There is still a lot of stigma tied to mental illness, depression, and suicide.
I relapsed many times this month. I'm going back to therapy. I'm headed towards recovery. I am healing.
My playlist is a mixture of songs about healing, songs about pain, and songs that I've listened to years ago when I was a severely depressed teenager that has stuck with me throughout this whole journey.
To anyone who battles with depression and suicidal thoughts, I know it sounds extremely cliche, but you are not alone. It's so easy during this time to hyperfocus on the feeling of loneliness and on what causes us pain. I was so shocked at how many people was admitted to the hospital for suicidal attempts the last time I admitted myself to the hospital for treatment, and it showed me that I was not alone in how I was feeling.
Overcoming Depression and Suicidal Thoughts
